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A Conversation with Fear, by Mermer Blakeslee
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"We all pack different ideas and feelings into the word fear: fear of the unknown, fear of failure, of losing control, of aging, of falling down, fear of the body reacting and fear of the body not reacting, even the fear of saying the word fear. This book does not attempt to define fear or explain why a frightened person experiences certain physiological responses. It doesn't separate students into categories or classify symptoms. What this book does attempt is to offer you both audacity and comfort. Although comfort feels quiet, it arrives through a bold move: accepting the presence of fear. To do this, we must pick our way between two powerful tendencies, to control and to cure, the Scylla and Charybdis of our culture. These tendencies show themselves constantly in words like manage, handle, overcome, conquer, dispel, banish, fix... By regarding fear as a pathology to control or cure, we assume that life without its presence is possible, normal, or even desirable. But once we accept fear as a habitual acquaintance in an imaginative, meaningful life, we can begin to cultivate a conversation with it rather than engage it in a fight." From A Conversation with Fear, Formerly titled In the Yikes! Zone
- Sales Rank: #2545694 in Books
- Published on: 2010-12-13
- Ingredients: Example Ingredients
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.50" h x .55" w x 5.51" l, .69 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 242 pages
- ISBN13: 9781617562723
- Condition: New
- Notes: BRAND NEW FROM PUBLISHER! 100% Satisfaction Guarantee. Tracking provided on most orders. Buy with Confidence! Millions of books sold!
About the Author
Mermer Blakeslee is the author of the acclaimed novels Same Blood and In Dark Water. As an examiner for the Professional Ski Instructors of America and a former member of its elite National Demonstration Team, she trains teachers across the country, specializing in fear, innovation, and learning. At Windham Mountain, she created and runs the Fear Workshop and an intensive season-long program called PowerLearn™. She lives in the Catskill Mountains in upstate New York. Her website is www.mermerblakeslee.com.
Most helpful customer reviews
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful.
A Conversation with Mermer
By Amazon Customer
"A Conversation with Fear" is, simply put, a fabulous read and a deeply insightful inquiry into fear -- its causes and remedies. Blakeslee observes that she uses "skiing as a metaphor" so as "to clarify our intricate relationship with fear and invite into our lives the power of surrender." As a skier (near finishing his seventh decade of life), I obviously felt at home with the metaphor, as will any skier. The first question, of course, is whether or not a non-skier would find Blakeslee a kindred spirit as well. And the answer is "that depends."
Consider, as Blakeslee does, that we live in a culture where the dominant paradigm is built on control, of the self and of the other (be this nature, animals, or our conspecifics). And when we feel our control slipping or, worse, when we feel that we've lost control, fear wells up as a powerful, sometimes paralyzing force. A person who has experienced fear, in this sense, will likely find "a conversation with fear" a liberating read -- that is, "freeing from the paralyzing force of fear."
A skier (or for that matter anyone at home in the natural world --"lions and tiges and bears, oh my!"), who has placed himself or herself in "harm's way" on a snow-covered mountain, almost surely knows the feeling. And the remedy for fear, you ask? There is, as Blakeslee suggests, no simple remedy to the pyschological complexity of fear.
But there is a way, a path if you will, that has many markers to guide us past fear. Indeed, she argues that, however fearful, each of us has a guide who, if we listen, can move us along the path into a space, a clearing where fear has disappeared, dissolved into the kind of embrace a skier feels on a perfect powder day when body, skis, and mountain have become an effortless synergy.
I realize that the notion of an effortless synergy sounds "new agish," almost mystical in the sense of Atman is Brahman and so on. And yet if we think of skiing as a metaphor which helps us grasp the reality of fear, we see that Blakeslee is on solid ground. Metaphors are by design intended to aid us in comprehending a subject that is poorly understood (fear, in this case) by conceptually bridging across the unknown in terms of a known (skiing, in this case).
A powder skier knows that to fear the powder is to be paralyzed, where struggle is soon followed by exhaustion. Powder is not to be controlled. Rather the skier gives him or herself over to it -- the synergy, free of fear.
In the final analysis, then, perhaps Blakeslee finely woven narrative is more readily accessible to a skier. But surely the book offers handholds for the nonskier who knows fear as well.
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful.
I owe Mermer Blakeslee a beer or ten
By A. Harrison
I was really struggling with doing anything more extreme than a bunnyish green slope before I read this book, and had been for months. The techniques in this book completely changed how I tried new ski runs, and now (combined with a couple of lessons for technique) I'm skiing easy to mid-range blues.
This book isn't a substitute for lessons by any means - Mermer Blakeslee doesn't really talk about ski technique much at all. What she does cover is how to get the troll who's whispering on your shoulder to go away, and how to manageably widen your comfort zone. That controlled push of the comfort zone, combined with returning to what you're comfortable with, is a huge confidence builder and gives us permission to take smaller successful steps instead of trying big jumps and failing.
The only downside I would note with this book is that Ms. Blakeslee seems to be disdainful of organized religion. I'm sure she just feels like she's providing examples, but there are only so many times I can read about Catholic guilt and how mistakes make her feel like she's intrinsically a bad person before it's evident that Ms. Blakeslee has some religious issues. I found it offputting enough that I probably would never take one of her classes in person, but I can skim over it in the book, and it's still an excellent and instructive read. I'd knock half a star off for this if Amazon allowed it.
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful.
A conversation with Fear
By jdbrown
Mermer Blakeslee, incredible job...This book is a benefit to those of us struggling with fear of the unknown. I would definitely recommend it as a guide in setting the stage for building ones inner self.
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